I'm fat. Hence the new name, Little Miss Figgy. I've always been fat... but was never THIS MUCH.
I've been (slightly) in denial for 2 years. As months went by, I have unconsciously redid my wardrobe just to suit my shape. I wear baggy blouses and oversized shirts, avoid sleeveless tops, stopped wearing jeans, and most of the time wear black. I've (still) unconsciously followed every workaround in the book.
(I wasn't the fashionista kinda gal, so what I meant was I used to wear fitted shirts and pants. Now I can't.)



But there's no denying, my eating has gone beyond control.
It all started when one day at work, I was assigned to a dreadful project, and all I did for fun was to eat. I never liked sweets that much, but during those dark days, I seek comfort in food (chocolates mostly). I never felt guilty because all I was thinking was I deserved it. Little did I know, for an entire year, I was stress-eating. Then it just went on and on after that.

Suspect # 1 - 3 bags of this per day per week(?)

Suspect #2 - I eat everything that came in this flavour

Suspect #3- Any chocolate will do.

And more... They're all guilty.

Many started to notice, and no matter how people try to either sugar coat or be blunt about it, hearing anyone say, "My god, you've gotten fat" never left a good feeling.
It's been 2 years now and you'd think hearing people call me fat every now and then is something I can get used to, but that's not the case. (And neither can other people, so do everyone a favour.)

It nudged my self-esteem down more than I thought it could. I stopped taking pictures. Avoided bumping into relatives and old friends. Tried wearing make up to feel better about myself.
¡Qué horror!

I never said I was skinny! Haha! It's probably hard to tell but I don't have a lot to compare. I don't really take pictures often, apparently. And of course I don't want to post the very ridiculous ones. L O L.

Then I figured: Acceptance is always the first step.
We're not stopping there. I'm not going to just live with it. First, I must accept that yes, an extra 18 lbs. is indeed a big deal, and from there I can start working my way down. I'd argue it applies to everything, actually. You can't fix what you think ain't broken! You dig?

1) Exercise 2) Eat Healthy 3) Sleep early.
The steps are easy, it's the motivation that I lack. That's extremely hard to work on when it's just more fun and easier to eat out with Ian every day and night.

The first of May. It's a new month, it's a new day. I am yet to shed a lot of those extra pounds, and it's not happening while I sit down here and type, is it? So, first thing tomorrow morning evening, I'm gonna hit the gym pool like a madafaka and keep you guys posted with this "fitness journey".

6 00 PM in the summer

And with that I leave you... as my #FitnessWitness!
See you in skinnytown, betchaz!

"The only person that has to believe you can--is you.
Everybody else will just have to see it for themselves."